I can’t help but have 2006 immersed through my whole body. Winter is always a nostalgic season of reflection. One can never help but look at the bare trees only to imagine what they looked like a mere 3 monthes ago. The memory seeks to arrange them in such a way that brings comfort. Innocent gazes emit throughout a series of events from the year past and leave me with feelings of apprehension.
you always listen other entrepreneuers- striving and already successful- recall on their past experiences and feelings of wondering if the world was going to let them in. Let them in to cash in on all of societal offerings. Status, lattes, vacations, states of being, the privilege of good health and everything encompassing.
I will have to be perfectly honest with you. Where is my confidence? Where is my killer instinct? I always thought capitalistic ventures was displaced hunting instinct. In many eays they are synonymous with one another. And of course, both acts are mainly associated with masculinity. Does that mean I am doomed in this endeavour? No of course not, but I can’t help but question not my success, or ability to achieve but instead my own confidence.
I can’t help but sit back and look at all the confident personas in this world. When I think of whose presence strikes me by nothing more than their confidence (not cockiness, not arrogance, but good ole confidence), almost all the faces are men. I laugh at the thought of their existence, and am entertained and oddly comforted by the thought of their own smugness. In many ways they are my role models. Successful, entertaining characters embodying many desirable characteristics based on personality. Oh there’s a thought.
Then I wonder where are all the female figures serving as role models in my life? I obviously have my mother, aunt, cousin- all close female family members. I have my friends. I turn my attention to the media. Where are the star athletes who I admire for their prowess and quick attention. Where are those big shot lawyers whose gift for words and-confidence- can take on the world. Where are those CEO’s. Where are those poets…(well actually that’s a bad example, how many poets exist at all)
Where’s the range of role models? Where are those women who would truly let any little girl (even if its just at heart) believe they could truly do anything.
I guess I better get workin….
